Giving up

Giving up

We can all feel like giving up sometimes. Sometimes when we are rather young. There can be good reason for giving up when we are old, for we feel we have seen it all and done all that we have wanted to do. Much of our curiosity is sated. We have got the answers we wanted. Only minor curiosity pathways have not been satisfied. We need these drives to be in full working operation. When your body begins to fail you might not be able to do all the things that you found rewarding in years prior. It depends on what gives you a thrill. The notion of old age being a golden age relies on luck.

We are biological machines and machines are renowned to go awry. If your curiosity disengages, so do you. There can be a pause in peoples’ ability to feel reward too. People function very poorly as a result. Those that lose their selfishness become lost souls. When someone stops feeling pleased with themselves or stops getting any sense of gratification from daily activities, they lose all motivation to go out and do. We need that sense of moving forward and have direction in life. If any one of the drives disappears or wasn’t formed properly in the first place, you are in effect much less human. Survival is wanted where the selfishness prospers. If you never feel good about helping, you are in danger of being helpless yourself.

To take one’s own life because of an irreversible physical issue is one thing, but it is pathetic to even consider it, just to avoid facing difficult circumstances. Don’t kill yourself because of debt. You can make yourself bankrupt and start afresh. When you are in a better financial position after bankruptcy, you may be able to gradually pay a little back to those you owed. Don’t kill yourself because you feel trapped. Escape is always possible. When you fall out or foul up there is always a way to figure out a solution. Apologise, make amends, reorganise, restructure. Use your curiosity to find a way forward.

So, what choices do we have when we reach rock bottom, when we are at the lowest point in our life, and everything is a major struggle? Option silly, kill yourself. Option two, see your situation as an opportunity. Death or chance to pack your things and walk away. You can leave your troubles behind and start afresh somewhere else. If you are at a point where it can’t get much worse, you really do have nothing to lose. Maybe you can return one day and explain yourself to those that worried about you. You can’t explain yourself properly by leaving a note and jumping off a bridge.

I said, ’just to avoid’ facing difficult circumstances, at the time it feels more than ‘just a difficult period’. We may feel totally heartbroken. We might not be able to see a way forward right now. In time you will. People do. Those that slog onwards have come out the other side, relieved that they are still here. They will be bruised and battered for sure. They look back and see the turning point in their life. They become bigger characters afterwards. Shame and torment slowly fade. The things that we were ashamed of are turned into a badge of honour of sorts. We admit our mistakes. We acknowledge where we went wrong. We know that we also did a lot right. If needed, we show contrition. We make amends if possible.

Whilst there will always be people that are at the ready to bully you and be very hurtful, escape is always possible. The game of life can be a monstrous challenge, bring it on rather than let it bring you down. Never concede - you can’t regret dying. If ever in a spot of confusion, you don’t have to do it today. Leave it until next year and see how you feel then. You can be like those in war zones who considered themselves dead already. When they thought of themselves as dead already, they lost all fear of living. If you think of yourself as the walking dead, then you will have no difficulty unburdening your woes to people that will listen. You can take the fight to them with nothing to lose.

Think of the things you have not done yet. Think of all the people that you want to be with when they get together and have babies, pass exams, and get to where they want to go. There is no place for envy. Your time will come when you too will be the subject of interest to them also. Some have explored their co-considerational selfishness through charity work. They treasured the sense of being needed and feel much better about themselves. You do not have to do dull fundraising. Simple hands-on active involvement is as useful. You both gain, you, more so. Plenty will appreciate your charity assistance but, in the process, you heal yourself. Helping others helps you in equal measure.