Fakes and frauds

Universally admired

When I come across people that are popular and entertaining. People that draw others in. I ask myself, what does one need to do to be like that. What does it involve. I know it is best to be accommodating, laugh at other people’s jokes and show a reasonable degree of interest in what others are doing. It is also helpful to avoid prejudicial comments. We can provide affirmation. Add to what others are saying rather than being frequently contrary and difficult. Speaking about our own circumstances with clarity, passion without over exuberance. None of which is easy to elucidate but better understood through careful observation of those that manage it well. You may watch those that are accessible to a fair degree but will wander off and mingle to avoid over playing it - unconsciously leaving people wanting more. Adaptability is key in the popularity game as it is in so many other areas of life. You need to switch from being serious to being comical, depending upon the people you are with. Cheerful banter some of the time and absorbing discourse at other times.

The aspiration to be loved by all, is naïve. One should not be surprised when streams of negative comments roll in as your notoriety radiates. The more people know of you, the more exposed you will be to a wider set of views. If we all liked the same thing, then you could in theory be universally admired. However, that is not the case. There will be a percentage that are willing to home in on what they regard as your negative attributes. It is simple maths; more exposure means more chance of criticism, more disgruntlement.

We find ourselves able to fit in better in some situations than others. We may need to accept that. Deeper dialogue interests me the most, but that doesn’t sit well with those that want to stick to brevity, buoyancy, and frivolity. Don’t be fooled, these meaningful conversations stick in people’s mind, they have an impact. Frivolity fades fast. I like to test ideas and propositions on lots of people to see what objections arise. I would use this ability to mingle with the masses to hear people’s counter arguments. It would not matter who they were, not their age nor work status. To me, all views were useful. I saw no point in formulating an answer to a question that could not be understood by the majority. Granted, some effort on their behalf is required at times. No matter how careful and what clarity employed, it doesn’t take much for people to pick up the wrong end of the stick and start hitting you with it. Usually when they don’t absorb everything that was said. I have reservations about coming out with the bleeding obvious, but what may seem obvious to me is not always quite so for others. Some gems were brought to the fore by some remarkably innocent individuals who I least expected to provide insight. Holes could be filled, and I would be re-armoured for the next victim.

I asked a taxi driver if they had ever done anything altruistic. He ummed and ahhed for a while, then admitted that he was not too sure what the word meant. When I explained it, he understood the concept and thought about it for a bit. The driver couldn’t provide an instance of altruism on his own part. The same problem arose a week later when I asked someone else the same question. They too didn’t know what it meant. Then the person who was in the taxi with me the week before piped up and said that she didn’t know what it meant either until I explained it. That got me a bit worried, so that night I asked some thirty people if they could tell me what altruism is. One middle aged soul sat there racking their mind akin to when someone is trying to bring an answer to a quiz question to the fore. Pensioners, managers, bar staff, even a whole table full of dinners could not provide any sort of definition. This was quite a shock, a revelation, and I felt that care was needed in any writing; it had to be devoid of too much jargon. Words that I presumed were quite common were not remotely so. We can reduce it a bit and keep the eloquence.