One of the many things the book (ignorance paradox) reminds us is that there are counter moves to all issues we face. The issue in question here is how to deal with pests. Pests in this case being those that harry us for intimacy. One can be minding one's own business and a stranger approaches trying it on. Their aim is sex. They do not care if you already have a partner. Any protestations of "No thank you", "not interested", "leave me alone" are ignored. Saying that you have a husband / wife / boyfriend / girlfriend rarely puts them off. Given that they are not there with you right now, they can't intervene or make their presence felt. Some won't even give a damn if the partner is nearby anyway.
Be nice, polite and hope they get the message. A tact that can work, but not always.
Be rude, firm and hope they leave you alone. This tact can work but can be onerous and again not always something that works.
What other strategies can be employed? It is a shame that people need plans in place for such eventualities. For many it is a regular frequent thing. Plus people around us are not always willing to help or get involved. With lots of testosterone running through peoples' veins, tensions run high. However, it is not just women that are pestered. It can be towards men by some women and by all combinations, men by men, women by women.
How much dialog do we allow?
The items in the chapter "Conversation" will be used in reverse. We want to bore them, not entice or excite. Don't acknowledge or even respond in any way to what they are telling you about themselves. Don't even bother to point out their lies or inconsistencies. Don't involve them in your conversation at all. Boring people talk about themselves, thus be that boring person. They might be a good listener which can be a hindrance in these scenarios. A good listener will ask questions. In these situations, do not answer them. Make no reference to the questions. If the question is repeated, repeat 'not hearing' it.
Vulnerable people can be most attractive. So, appearing the opposite of that is a huge help. Show that you are independent, capable. You do not need help with anything. Maybe a dull diatribe about a business meeting early tomorrow with important people. Ignore any offers, drinks etc. Never return or offer any favours - people, namely you, begin to like people more when you help them. You don't want to like them or build any sympathy.
They mention that they are recently divorced. -> No nod of the head. No saying oh dear. Instead mention that there is a cricket match on tomorrow.
They talk about how wealthy they are. -> "Wealthy people are causing the most global warming", but then quickly change the subject back to you not them. You don't want them to start defending themselves.
Brief stunted responses, always. Never agreeing or disagreeing with what they are saying. If you open up the slightest avenue in, you make it ever harder to get them to go. Blank facial expressions, no frowns, no shock, no awe, no eye rolls and none of those beautiful inflections that we normally crave.
You are welcome to read a book about you, me and everyone else. Some of you will get to understand what drives us all.
When you look up into the night sky you may be able to make out the odd star, but light pollution prevents you from seeing much. Go to the "middle of nowhere" and the spectacle is very different. You see it all. This book is like that. Every facet of human behaviour becomes clear, the psychology, our dreams, our aspirations, our wishes and wants. It is all uncovered.
A film looking as gender imbalances. One day we might decide that we set rules that do not mention genders. We may begin to treat people as peolple with no positve or negative discrimination based on their perceived sex.
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