Phobias

Visualisation

A bad memory can stick out ten times more than a good one. Bad memories can be very troublesome. They can haunt us. Thankfully, there is a way to deal with them. Some have triggers. Some just keep playing with no specific cause. If only we can forget things - forget what we do not want to remember. You cannot wipe memories at will. However, you can dampen the horribleness of them to a point where they no longer bother you. Bad memories can be dealt with. Anyone with the right know how can deal with them. To all intents and purposes, they become as good as erased.

Memories are cells with links between them. One thing linking to another. A strong pronounced memory will have lots of links to it. Lots of strong links. We make new memories by making new links. Therefore, if we change the links we do not want, a memory will fade. The memory cell will remain in place for a while but the links to it can be weakened. To make a memory we don’t want fade away from our conscious, we need only re-route some memory cells. To quell a bad memory we need to create a fork in the road and mentally go down the new road each time the bad memory comes to the fore. The troublesome road in your mind at present will contain a nasty part – the part that causes you the most consternation, the most anguish. That needs a bypass.

Firstly, create the new road. Think of a sequence that is nice. The sequence can be anything that gives you pleasure, enjoyment, or is simply peaceful. You choose. That sequence needs to be ten to fifteen seconds long. A scenario maybe. A memory of a walk. Something romantic or semi-sexual in nature. Anything that your mind can think about that takes at least ten seconds to complete. When the unwanted memory comes into your mind, switch to this new road. Force yourself to dwell on this new thought path and go through the entire sequence.

When the troublesome thought begins, you must divert before the nasty part and play out the new sequence at that point. You need do this over and over, 20, 30, 40 times, dwelling on the nice thoughts at the end. Whatever the trigger, be it a time of the day, a smell, or the mere mention of a certain word, you run your thoughts down the line and break off to a new imaginary world. Each time it is set off you run it through to this different outcome. Over time the whole escapade fades and you don’t voyage deep into the nicer parts. The triggers don’t have an ill effect anymore. So long as the process is repeated every time, the issue can subside within a matter of days or at worst a month or so depending on the severity.

Some people hate the sight of shit. Confronting some unexpectedly in a toilet can be disturbing. Re-enter the bathroom in your mind and visualise a nice clean flushed pan. Then visualise coming out and meeting a nice person. Take a good look at a clean toilet bowl. Remember it. Visualise it, then dwell on the interaction with the person in any way you see fit. Run through a quick conversation. Think about the things you like about her/him. Focus on what they are wearing perhaps.

Memories may fade on their own over time, but this process accelerates it considerably. If you have a bad memory of an injured person, displace it with a picture of a healed-up individual. Dwell your mind on the healed-up person. Repeat these simple diversions every single time the unwanted memory gets your attention. The diversions will eradicate the horrid unwelcome thoughts soon enough. Pick something in life that you like a lot, then dwell upon various aspects of it for a good ten to fifteen seconds each time the bad thought gets your attention. The moment that unwanted thought pops into your head, cast your mind onto the nice thought path. Run it through for as long as you can.

A re-route in the mind relating to a horrible action that you have seen could involve comeuppance. Those that have bad memories relating to what someone has done will think of some punishment, comeuppance for the evil doer. In your head you will imagine what the bad man, or bad woman will suffer as punishment for what they have done. Eye for an eye, tooth for a tooth punishment. Whatever story that seems appropriate. Each time you think about this bad person and what they have done, think of the story you have created and how it makes the world a better place now that they have been dealt with. Dwell on the revenge, comeuppance, for ten to fifteen seconds each time. In my mind, the darstard who put a boy to sleep and lay a hot spoon on his eyes to deform him, deformed so that the boy will earn more money from begging, was shot. Bullets shattered the bones of the dastard. The dastard dies in my vivid imagination in a satisfactory way. I will have eternal empathy for the boy but little trouble with the disturbing memory of the evil inflicted upon him. Karma is cathartic. Even imaginary karma.

Strong links create habit pathways. Good habits; experience. Not so good ones; your potential downfall. In the same way that you can get rid of bad memories, you can get rid of undesirable habits. Change the links and you cease your unwanted habit. Rather than just using thought processes alone, one will usually need to physically do things to temper a habit.

Habit paths lead somewhere. They lead to reward. On the way to reward we get excitement and expectation of reward. Thus, to change a habit we need to change the end point. We need to do all bar receive the reward to curtail the compulsion. If we go through the first part of the habit and not the second part, the rewarding part, the habit dies. No reward, no expectation of reward. No reward at the end leads to disappointment. So, we can use an active disappointment strategy to lessen the temptation of gambling, gaming and drug taking.

When something becomes a destructive aspect of your life instead of an acceptable vice, a physical enactment will curtail it. Drug taking involves preparation. During the preparation the excitement and expectation builds. Unpacking, sorting, heating, mixing, and loading a syringe are steps that precede the reward. An addict will be encouraged to go through these steps and stop at the point of injection. They will be made to handle the drug, prepare it for injection but walk away once ready to inject. They will do this over and over. They will notice their intense feeling of anticipation rise dramatically when doing so. However, as they become accustomed to not receiving the powerful reward, these notions of anticipation diminish a little each time. It dampens the associated feelings of expectancy when they see other users or encounter the drug in their environment. Reminders are everywhere. Reminders that lead the addict through the thought process towards the reward. By taking the end point away those reminders no longer lead to anticipation. Habits have reminders. Habits have context, maybe a time of day, a place. A quit smoking advert acts as a perfect reminder to have a cigarette.

People have tried making addicts get bored by their habit. This tactic tends to fail. Gambling addicts have been placed in front of a betting machine for hours on end hoping that the sheer monotony will dissuade them. It doesn’t work. Making them go up to the machine, but not bet, over and over is more productive.

Habits, lifestyle, diet, drinking, pleasure and pain. Moderation in all things. Do you feel that you are doing too much of something and not enough of something else. Have you found the desire to change but are tempted to change too much, too quickly, too drastically. Which is sensible: Ditching the car, twice a week, and walking to work. Entering a marathon that is set to take place in a few weeks’ time. Be happy with small changes. They add up.

If you find yourself doing something to excess, it doesn’t mean you have to give it up completely. Cut back maybe. Be happy. Managing without may need a coping strategy. People find a distraction and allow the time to pass, seeing if they can keep their mind off the issue for an hour at a time. Don’t be fooled though. You can find yourself giving up on so much that life becomes pleasure free. It would be rather annoying if you make every effort to do the right thing, you conform to satisfy those in your circle of influence, you iron out your many defects then get struck by lightning. Killed with everything in place that marked you as a success.