Timothy and Samantha were relaxing on their last day of what was a fabulous holiday.

They had seen a lot, eaten a lot, and met a lot. The tour guide however was keen for them to see the elephants before they leave. Timothy was not too keen, a little tired from all the travels and Samanatha wanted to get the packing done early. Not to disappoint this friendly tour guide, they relented and went with him..

They set out in a rugged jeep to a spot where the guide was sure some elephants would be. And he did not let them down.

What they did not expect however was for one of elephants to take umbrage with their presence that day. The elephant charged at them, trampling Samantha, crushing her skull, flattening it like one flattens, flattens, flattens anything you can think of.

The tour guide had good intentions, but alongside those intentions lay risk and potential tragedy.

I say and say, over and over again, that there is a lot to be said for looking at people’s intentions. Sometimes we find what others do objectionable, but their intentions were good. That is what usually matters. Intentions with the potential for coupled jeopardy does not feel like a dichotomy with competing forces, competing ideas. Jeopardy can follow good intentions sometimes, not often, sometimes.

We can all face situations such as they did with the charging elephant. The tour guide has the best of intentions but downplayed the risks maybe in his own mind as well as in the minds of Timothy and the late Samantha.

The elephant tale tells us a story about intentions and risk. Wise people examine risks; they look to see what risks are abound. We are reluctant to say no at times. We don’t want to offend. We don’t want to come across as a ‘party pooper’. However, if you get a sense of ‘not worth it’ then decline invitations. Decline politely. Thank people profusely and decline. You soon forget about it. You can cast the minor ‘offence’ aside in your mind and not let it bother you. Timothy and Samantha would have caught a flight home and most likely never saw that tour guide again even if the excursion went to plan. It is nice to be nice, but being nice in some situations is sheer folly.

The idea that we do well by looking at intentions stands. Intentions matter. The odd cases where good intentions lead to jeopardy are rare, but you only die once so caution is recommended. When we rebuff people without looking at their intentions we show our mean side. When we shun people without looking at their intentions we show our mean side. When we shame people without looking at their intentions we show our mean side.